Conservatives Are All Wrong!

Yup.  We lost the election.  We Conservatives need to recognize that we are wrong, both as matters of policy and practice.  Time to surrender to the victorious and glorious Left.

No less a source than The Imaginative Conservative suggests raising a sacrastic white flag of capitulation.  In a delightful article Tuesday, they turn Conservativism upside down in order to see the world as it now is.  Some quotes from the piece:

Who knew that we could multiply our nation's wealth by dividing and redistributing it? We need only the courage to believe and we'll surely see that we conservatives have been obstructing the best remedy to our malady. We can spend our way out of debt! It's time we stop worrying about our current sixteen trillion dollar debt and all the long-term unfunded liabilities ($84 trillion on Medicare alone!), and just step on the gas and go forward! Let Uncle Sam write bigger and bigger checks to more and more people. When we can always just print more money. It's time we realize that the piper never needs to be paid. There's always more road to kick the can down. “Political Economy means that everybody except politicians must be economical.”

And,

Real Conservatives Don't Cry, Speaker Boehner

It's also time for us conservative communitarians to realize that only a centralized bureaucracy in a far distant capitol, overseen by a tiny panel of unaccountable, unelected, elite political appointees can efficiently order our local communities and market economies for us. Those experts can do it better than can the little platoons of leaders living within each locality who are surely unaware, simply unprepared, unenlightened, and unequipped to deal with the unique challenges that face their particular communities. "[All] men must be so stupid that they cannot manage their own affairs; and also so clever that they can manage each other's.” How can those localities ever muster the know-how—much less marshal the needed funds—to handle all the problems of their neighborhoods when compared to the enormous wisdom and consolidated resources available to our the centralized government? “I’ve searched all the parks in all the cities and found no statues of committees.” It's simply better and more efficient to have every municipality conform to the dictates of the burgeoning bureaucracy in the District of Columbia, and it's time we conservatives stop biting the hand that feeds us. Let us dispense with this 'laboratories of democracy' nonsense about "states' rights." The states' rights issue was settled once and for all with the Civil War. Heck, even conservative hero, Russell Kirk, said that technically states cannot have rights, only people have rights.

And,

It's also best if we come to realize that our Constitution is a living document, a capricious, arbitrary, ethereal set of ideals rather than a strict code for conducting the affairs of the state and restraining the actions of our politicians. We must look at the silver lining to this dark cloud; someday we so-called conservatives will be back in charge, and then it will be grand to be empowered to grant privileges and subsidies to our votaries without having to worry about obstacles like Congress or the Supreme Court. I am happy to be a real ray of sunshine this morning but, alas, collectivism and progressivism never fails, so it's surely a fantasy to wish for those days to return. It would be useless to stand on our principles and attempt to earn the favor of public opinion with persuasive arguments. The Left tells us that we only infuriate people by discussing our out-of-date ideas. Far better for our party to know when we're beaten, stop fighting for our ideas, and become merely the Democrat-light Party.

If you can't beat 'em, join 'em. Eat, drink, and be merry for we'll never run out of other people's money!  And anyhow, in the long run we're all dead.